(apologies to Nick Cave - many stolen and bastardised lyrics inside this performance piece - al)
“my face is finished - my body's gone - and I can't help but think - standing up here in all this applause and gazing down at all the young and the beautiful with their questioning eyes - that I must above all things - love myself...”
like lazza himself - dig yourself nick - get ready for love – set me free
but my mouth like black black cotton up here in this foyer of justice – a cave of wet remembrance
coz a long black-haired skinny god of cool is in the house now, this ghost of the baddest seed, this bastard museum of bashed, bent n biblical lyrics - of birthday parties and boys next door – of orgiastic guitar, of painted strippers on my munted body – my mortality, this love of organised stanzas of hate and the perfect strut and stance - of naked full-blooded violence – the birth of a concrete vulture – this darkest night..
yr subway words hammer in my head - yr blood as a pen, beaten n robbed in the fading city light – yr face like a bug, an art school failure
and i’m not fit to tie yr fucking shoes – i’m hideous to the eye - a fat little insect - the stripper dancin on all fours in his birthday fucking suit – the stench of London, the st kilda scum – a punk gothic
we call upon the sainted author to explain – yeah man – we need the authors’ explanation – the underlying seeds of all this – the cognac, pethidine, the heroin of it all - the grinderman’s methadone plan – a twelve-step poem, a bleeding Wangaratta nightmare
hey my friends, lovers, diggers and beggars – so we ain’t believing - in interventionist gods here tonight man - one microscopic cog in his catastrophic plan
but if we did, if i did, if you did motherfuckers - I would kneel down and ask Him not to intervene - not to touch a hair - yet to leave you baby as you are - to direct you, direct you into my arms
and hey, we don't believe in the existence of angels either - but looking at you I wonder if that's true - and ask the angels to watch over you - to each burn a candle for you - to make bright and clear your path - and to walk, like Christ, in grace and love
and i believe in love - in some kind of path – man, we can walk down it, me and you - always and evermore - Into my arms, into my arms - my broken, scarred and pricked arms, my germanic syringes, yr pornography of religion
nick man, let’s take a litlte walk to the edge of town - across the track, where the viaduct looms, like a bird of doom as it shifts and cracks - where secrets lie in the border fires, in the humming wires
he's a ghost, he's a guru – and they're whispering his name through this disappearing land but hidden in his coat is a red right hand - here he comes
you'll see him in your head, on the TV He's a ghost, he's a god, he's a man, he's a guru - designed and directed - his nest high up in the autumn branches, built from nothing but high hopes and thin air, collected up some baby blasted mothers who took their chances
and we've laid the cables and the wires, we've split the wood and stoked the fires - we've lit our town so there is no place for crime to hide - our little church is painted white and in the safety of the night we all go quiet as a mouse - since the word got out - from the North down to the South - no-one's left in doubt - there's no fear about - if we all hold hands and very quietly shout Hallelujah - god is in the house
back here in this july city night – in their bloated museums, all the magicians, the mathematicians - across the wet-paved, tree-lined light-lit thoroughfares - and baby, we're hip to the sound of six billion people going down, blocking the sun - blood running down the inside of her legs, the moon in the sky is battered and mangled and the bells from the chapel go jingle-jangle - we made every effort not to abuse her - crazy bracelets on her wrists and her ankles - and the bells from the chapel go jingle-jangle – do you love me? do you love me? do. you. love. me?
lets celebrate the murder of sadness, the rape of the melancholy muse – busting the rhymes – the batman regret – a permanent fear of the denial of youth – the killing of aggression – growing to each other’s faces – no grace in rebellion – no end to the 30 years of relentless scars – the unreliable muse is dead – the author unexplained – look yonder – look yonder - sailing ships around me... never enough exclamation marks anyway – dig dig dig...
so yeah man, I bought her a dozen snow white doves - I did her dishes in rubber gloves - I called her honey bee, I called her love - but she just still didn't want to - she just never wants to – Damn...!
and you there, perhaps still with us in this friday cello cave rant leave religion to the psychos and fanatics – we’re tired and hardly breathing – we’re sick and tired of all this self-serving grieving
Kevin, go tell the women that we're leaving...
antipoet - allanboyd - july 2009 - for the nick cave exhibition... july 10 2009